|
 You
might be a Blue Neck if:
ARE NORTHERNERS
"BLUE NECKS"?
By now I'm sure
that you have heard all the Redneck jokes. Now here are some takes on
how Southern folks look at their Northern cousins:
YOU JUST MIGHT BE
A BLUE NECK IF
1. You think barbecue
is a verb meaning, "to cook outside."
2. You think Heinz
Ketchup is really SPICY!
3. You don't have
any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly.
4. For breakfast,
you would prefer potato au gratin to grits.
5. You don't know
what a moon pie is.
6. You've never
had an RC cola.
7. You've never,
ever, eaten okra, fried or boiled.
8. You eat fried
chicken with a knife and fork.
9. You've never
seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips.
10. You have no
idea what a polecat is.
11. You don't see
anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle.
12. You don't have
bangs.
13. You would rather
vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags.
14. More than two
generations of your family have been kicked out of the same prep school
in Connecticut.
15. You would rather
have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.
16. Instead of referring
to two or more people as "y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both
of them are women.
17. You don't think
Ted Kennedy has an accent.
18. You have never
planned your summer vacation around a gun-n-knife show.
19. You think more
money should go to important scientific research at your university than
to pay the salary of the head football coach.
20. You don't have
at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.
21. The last time
you smiled was when you prevented someone from getting on an onramp to
the highway.
22. You don't have
any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.
23. The farthest
south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus.
24. You call binoculars
opera glasses.
25. You can't spit
out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping.
26. You would never
wear pink or an applique sweatshirt.
27. You don't know
what applique is.
28. You don't know
anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy
Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice, et al).
29. You don't have
doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make one.
30. You've never
been to a craft show.
31. You get freaked
out when people on the subway talk to you.
32. You can do your
laundry without quarters.
33. None of your
fur coats are homemade.
This was sent
through the RCA mailing list by Deb :-) Thanks!!
 
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Formerly Goholin's Place since 1997.
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